Sunday, August 02, 2009

What If I'm Discovered?

So I awoke this morning remembering very distinctly a dream where I had a nervous break down (or at least that was the general consensus) and I was admitting myself to the hospital.

Oh. And did I mention I was running around in my underwear? Not that I really want to put that picture in any body's head, but I think it's an important fact. For whatever reason I was carrying my clothes rather than wearing them.

So I posted a little ditty on my FB page asking, "This is normal, right?" I got some very serious replies to what I thought was just funny and it made me think. I mean, seriously, why did I have a dream about having a nervous breakdown and more importantly why wasn't I wearing clothes?

I think I'm worried about being found out. You know. Some one's gonna come up to me at one of these workshops I'm doing and call me out. They'll tell everyone that I'm a fraud and I shouldn't be allowed to do this presentation. Basically, I'm afraid of being found out, exposed if you will.

*Shudder*

Do you ever have dreams than might mean something?

4 comments:

Nancy said...

If you want I can call you out during the presentation at my ward! :) No, I totally know what you mean about dreams being a little too real for comfort. I haven't had any recently that I thought might mean something, but in the past I have had plenty that either were foretelling of what I was going to go through, or were an indication of how much stress I was under (those were always a little crazy). Try to relax a little more (I know... hard to do when you're a mom), dreams are often the way your mind tries to figure things out from your life.

queenieweenie said...

I hope not 'cause I have some seriously funky dreams!

hayngrl101 said...

I have dreams about grad school and no showing to a final, or having other SLPs call me out and say that I'm incompetent and just pretending.

I think that what they mean is that I am insecure about myself. And honestly, I think that this could be a possibility for you as well.

Obviously, this is something that you REALLY want to do. Like, your life dream. And you wanna do it right and good and build on it. But I'm sure that on some level, you're worried about your performance and self-conscious or second guessing yourself. :)

SO, just get over it! You are great and awesome and you will do great!!

Jenna said...

Hyngrl, I think you hit the nail on the head. This is my dream, so fear of failure is just that much bigger.

But I'm already locked into 5 presentation, so I'll be able to learn and improve.